Chastity Mastity....

People of the Square Screen....

So my dad always threatened about that dreaded chastity belt. As i am sure many of you young ladies know its one of those little things that's mentioned around the lunch table during family meetings or when a boy comes to visit................

Those moments would just jump out (right in front of me, he he he) and with making their nasty appearance (unexpectedly and not with open arms, well,) your face would turn an off red (and if you were blond or wearing a pink or red top, oh well its basically a New-York-Main-Street-Billboard-in-Lights screaming out the obvious).....and your palms become sweaty (which means sweat droplets accumulate on your forehead naturally accentuating the bright lights and your heart screams out as only those yellow taxis can) Terribly traumatizing i must say...., however when you become older well, the blushing kind of stops and you end up rolling your eyes 'ah dad, again.....really.....'

Strange though where the story derives from...King Arthur was leaving on some 'save the day trip' and had to leave his beloved Guinevere with the Knights of the Round Table so he went to Merlin and asked his advice...

• 'Merls, ol' buddy ol' pal, i am to depart with first sun in the morrow, but my intestines squirm at the thought of leaving my loving and beautiful Guinevere unattended....After all Merl, ol' buddy ol' pal, you know what the Knights can be like, remember that trip we took to the marsh lands several fortnights ago.....Well Merl, ol' buddy ol' pal, i am sure you can feel my torturous predicament as it gnaws at my, immmmm nuts...'

My golly gosh me, really? A metal belt that envelopes a womans most delicate goodies AND with a key which is to be withheld from her AND in the hands of a man that 'loves her?'...

I'm having trouble understand this little ancient concept. Surely he trusted his wife...Surely he trusted his most faithful companions....Mmmmm, clearly not...If he trusted his wife there would be no need for such tremendously uncomfortable and unnecessary extremes and as for his trusted 'Knights'....you kidding right - I will trust you with my kingdom but not with my wife....

I would have to note this as a tragedy that Shakespeare would have done really well with...Othello and Romeo, not even Hamlet could comprehend such controversy which clearly labels a woman as, well as in need of being locked down....

One of the most vital ingredients for any relationship should be trust...So how much trust are you portraying if you lock your wifes goods up when you not around....!!!! Is she not trustworthy...If not, then why the heck would you wanna share your crown with her...Boggles my mind...

A chastity belt is needed for fathers/mothers with their daughters (figuratively speaking of course) as a humorous tool to possible bring the young back to earth when they feel the flutter of hormones lift them to higher levels...., but when a man has a thought so distrusting cross his mind as to lock his womans goodies down...oh dear - i think re-assessment might be in order...

U know you love me, without the belt...

xoxo