I love u, i do.... :-)

Peeps of the Past

Why is it that some people just can't pass through your system...I'm pretty stuck on a thought to be honest...You see (and i have written about this person before), but i think i am still well in love with my past...

There are those little occurrences that i just can't seem to shake. Walks on the beach, making love under the stars, love notes and sneaky meetings in public bathrooms and bus stops - (why, cause we could... :-)

So he moves in and out of my life when fate feels its needed and yes, whenever he pops back up, i welcome it...However, when will i let go and move on? Or, when will it come to a point of well, decision really?

There is a reason for all and i am fully aware of that and that is great - i would just really like to know when the time will be right? Mmmm, perhaps the time will be right once i have resolved a few of my own issues or when he has resolved some of his issues.

12 years - that is how long he has been in my life and every time our contact is rekindled, well its like yesterday. Its like we were never apart - like the time between us, the distance between us has always been bridged with what we share on every meeting.

So, yes, we are not together and yes i have not seen him yet, but i know i will - its building up to that again and i know that when i do see him....it will be a test again of whether the time is right again, or not...And then if its not, we will go our separate ways again and when the time aligns again we will meet again...Such is life and its okay.

I am patient with the process for i know that i am not ready currently - close but no cigar as yet...

I must admit though - i have never had much luck in love and people have come in and out of my life for ages now (feels like a few lifetimes really), but if there is one man that has always had a huge (if not the whole) part of my heart, its been him...There has been many encounters of love and so on and every one that has crossed my path has brought something to my life - at times not something good, but valuable lessons indeed. I have loved and lost, but in the core of my heart....in the core - well he is there, waiting, smiling, loving with arms wide open...

The passion, the connection, the affection, the love...the understanding and consideration. It has always been there and it has always been stronger than before...Eruption is bound to happen eventually. So, rush i will not, procrastinate i will not, but enjoy the next encounter i surely will.

Time is a ticking and he has the battery to my heart. Can anyone else match up? I don't think so...Maybe its another lesson and perhaps we will not be as my dreams hope, but then a valuable lesson is surely hiding behind those blue eyes of his...And i will be happy with whatever is meant to be pertaining to my past love....

So, feeling like a school girl with regards to him, yes. Butterflies still, yes....Fear, of course...Timing, hope so.....

So Peeps of the Past - a past love, a past flame that has never died but rekindled over and over....Mmmmm, I'm sure we have all had those :-)

You know you love me with sand on my feet and butterflies in my chest

xoxo